Friday, October 17, 2008

Overachievers and Underachievers

Well, I think it would be fairly safe to categorize myself as belonging to the former.
By this I am not saying that I am ''kiasu'', don't get me wrong. Kiasu-ness cannot be equated to overachieving and vice versa. Many people have different ideas of what is ''kiasu'' and for me, I see it as being a sore loser. People who always feel that they are better and cannot stand to see other people getting first prize as they believe that the number 1 spot is specially reserved for them. These people are what I call ''kiasu''. They would be the first to volunteer to help the teacher give out test papers just so they can compare everyone's marks. Very annoying. There are some people who are both ''kiasu'' and overachievers. That's bad. But anyway, not the point of this post....

I like to think of myself as being an overachiever, in that I strive to do the best that I can do. I can't say that I am 100% sure that I am not ''kiasu'' though. I guess I am ''kiasu'' to a certain extent but I prefer to call it competitive. For a person to be good at something, there must be competitiveness, no? I am somewhat, or rather, very similar to my mom who always gives her all to the point that she is taken for granted. She leaves for work as early as 8am and only comes home after 7pm. Often times she doesn't eat her lunch because she has no time. She never takes breaks and only goes for toilet breaks. Frankly, it's quite scary the way she works (no, she's not a labourer in some 3rd world country). But I picked up these things from her and I turned out ok, yet I wonder why he didn't. It puzzles me and worries me.

He is just so relaxed and....contented with being below average.
I find it difficult to understand him.
Exams are a few days away and there I see him wasting his time away playing some insignificant online game. Seriously. It's a lame game.
And everyone is telling him to buck up but it's falling on deaf ears.
Like menyiram air ke daun keladi or something.
His results before this were...well, let's put it this way, he could have done better. A LOT better.
My mom's even contemplating sending him to some snobby private school. That's serious. I mean, not to sound calculative really burns a hole in your wallet yea...
Darn it.

Anyway, going to IMU tomorrow.
Hopefully won't get lost along the way.
And I reallyreallyreally need to stop doing what I do.
Too obvious already.
If not I got no self-dignity left, might as well just scribble 'RETARD' on my forehead in thick, black permanent marker.

**I wish that the last farewell is not near**

Last Farewell-BigBang


JoanC said...

him as in your brother?

★rcal★ said...

yeah...very annoying